Here are 50 things most pregnant women and moms can relate to while reading my book, Expecting Perfect: My Bumpy Journey to Mommyhood
1. I did the whole legs-in-the-air thing after our baby-making attempts…and my husband was all for it.
2. While trying to conceive, I Googled “pregnancy symptoms” daily only to discover seemingly everything can be a tell-tale sign you’re pregnant. (Even numb teeth.)
3. It was weird buying a pregnancy test at Walgreens. I couldn’t check out fast enough.
4. Waiting for the test to analyze my pee seemed like an eternity, even though it only took a few minutes.
5. And when that “pregnant” verbiage popped up on the pee stick, I cried. (Tears of joy, of course!)
6. I will keep my urine-contaminated positive pregnancy stick forever.
7. I couldn’t wait to tell my husband he was going to be a daddy. The whole sharing the news thing, however, wasn’t over a romantic candle-lit dinner, like how I envisioned.
8. Once confirmed pregnant, I Googled “pregnancy” daily.
9. I became obsessed with doing everything right. There was no way in hell I was going to eat unpasteurized cheese, seafood, drink alcohol, or rare steak.
10. Your first ultrasound is wonderfully surreal. Hearing that initial heartbeat will take your breath away.
11. I stood bare-bellied in front of the mirror on a regular basis to analyze my tummy. I thought my bump would pop much sooner than it did.
12. …But I was stoked when my belly finally popped.
13. I could have slept through the first trimester. I have never been so tired in my life.
14. I feared miscarriage tremendously.
15. Whoever deemed it “morning sickness” must have been a guy. Nausea can strike at all hours.
16. Get a 3D ultrasound. They’re amazing.
17. Babymoons are not overrated. I wish I had realized how special the alone time with my husband was. Now the him and me time is scarce, and when we are alone, we are sleeping.
18. I thought my pregnancy would be perfect and flawless like in the movies.
19. …But it wasn’t.
20. I never thought I would have a high risk pregnancy.
21. …But I did.
22. Even though I was diagnosed with complete placenta previa at 20 weeks, I didn’t think any previa-caused risks would effect me. I’ve always been invincible. (Apparently I’m not.)
23. I took the elastic out of leggings. It was just more comfortable like that.
24. I bought complete coverage cotton panties one size too big…and I wore them. It was just more comfortable like that.
25. I got that dark line down my tummy called linea nigra. Even I found it unattractive.
26. Also unattractive: my protruding belly button.
27. I was in complete awe of my tummy moving from baby’s kicks, squirms, and punches.
28. OMG, and feeling baby flutter is the best thing in the world.
29. Bed rest is not fun.
30. You can have all the time in the world to get things done on bed rest and still manage to accomplish nothing.
31. And BTW, even TV becomes monotonous on bed rest.
32. Always have a hospital bag packed, especially if you’re a high risk pregnant lady.
33. Steroid shots in the butt hurt like a bitch. (You get them if you’re at risk of birthing a preemie to stimulate baby’s lung growth.)
34. Hospital food isn’t so bad if you pretend you’re at a resort ordering room service.
35. IVs are intimidating, but not as bad as you think. (Coming from a wimp.) However, hope your nurse pokes your vein right the first time, because numerous prodding attempts are annoying and painful.
36. Be positive even if you’re on hospitalized bed rest. Regardless, pregnancy is beautiful. Embrace even an imperfect experience.
37. Trust your doctor. I have never been so horrified when I bled rich, red, previa-caused blood. However, despite my worries, fears, and cries, my doctor handled my situation with urgency, care, grace, and compassion.
38. You lose all modesty when you’re in the hospital. I think 50 nurses saw my bare chest.
39. Be good to your husband. Just because he isn’t flaunting a baby bump, does not mean he isn’t experiencing a whirlwind of emotions throughout your pregnancy.
40. The epideral doesn’t hurt.
41. Neither does a c-section. (In my opinion.)
42. You will form a new appreciation for modern medicine.
43. Hearing your baby’s first cry is the best most relieving sound ever. It is proof all is good and healthy.
44. A girl’s gut doesn’t lie. We kept baby’s sex a surprise, but I knew he was a he the whole time.
45. And for the record, I never knew how much I could love a boy until my son. He was born the light of my life.
46. My son was born at 34 weeks. It took me a while to accept he was a preemie.
47. However, there is something super special about preemies.
48. I overly feared the NICU, but it ended up being a blessing in disguise.
49. Baby’s first poop looks like tar. With that being said, you’ll take such pride in that initial total poop. (We caught his on video camera.)
50. You’ll become the most biased person in the world. My son was born 4 pounds 11 ounces. He was (and still is) the most beautiful, perfect, doll-like baby in the entire world. (I’m sure you feel the same about your children!) Once having a child, everything else in your life becomes secondary.
Nadine Bubeck is a mom, wife, TV personality, host, speaker, blogger, and author.
Her book, Expecting Perfect: My Bumpy Journey to Mommyhood, is Nadine’s completely candid and uncut pregnancy journal. For more information, visit: www.expectingperfect.com.
And check out her online mommy show, All Things Mama:youtube.com/allthingsmama
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